Fortnight of Funnies

tintin-et-cie by Benedicte Delachanal

This is my second poem published in Rhyme & PUNishment: Comedic Verse as discussed yesterday :). The wonderful cartoon above is from French speaking Canadian artist Benedicte Delachanal who blogs at Carnet De Dessins.

Cartoon Life

I want to live a cartoon life.

Things are clean and crispy white
in cartoon land.
Tintin’s dog Snowy,
Casper the friendly ghost
and Snoopy breathe in
the illustrators oxygen.

Strong clear black lines,
simple forms.
Dirt, unpleasant odours and itchy orifices are found elsewhere.

Swift resurrection follows bomb blasts,
bloody severed heads and ruptured spleens
no-where to be found.

Cartoon cats are squished, splayed, spliced and stretched
into emaciated bubble gum shapes,
but no worries – they quickly
spring, re-inflate and snap back into shape.

Scientific principles, gravity, speed and such like, are flexible.

Daffy Duck steps off the cliff
suspended in mid-air, until realising
the jam he’s in and plummets to safety.

Bugs Bunny is catapulted out of a cannon,
speed unchanging until telephone poles get involved.

Cowardly cartoon characters exit buildings
via replica perforations in the walls.
The threat of marriage often the motivation.

Solid walls painted to resemble a tunnel
can be entered by some but not others.
Flattened bodies of rodents, rabbits and coyotes
are testament to this variability of access.

But best of all, bags possessed by cool characters
have the ability to hold any amount of stuff
with no changes in external dimensions
of the bag – just like the TARDIS in Dr Who.

Yes, I want to live a cartoon life.

__________________________________________________

Don’t forget to send me some funnies (poems, art, photos, stories etc.,) this week or next if you are a regular follower and commenter on this blog (I do like to know who I am conversing with 😉 ).

Let the games begin!