Captain Chaos (The Gabe Files)

Captain Chaos

Are you the sort of person who gets lost easily? Well I am one of those people, without a doubt. My life is littered with lostness (that ain’t a word) episodes.

There was the time when I was meant to be attending an alcohol and drugs conference in Melbourne and ended up at a Chaos Theory conference (wrong University – doh!). Deep down I think I was meant to be partying on with all those physicists.

There was the time when I was supposed to be going to a psychiatric clinic in South Brisbane to collect data forms for a research study on anxiety and (yes you guessed it) ended up at the wrong hospital.

I asked
“What floor is the psychiatric department on?”
and got
“We don’t have a psychiatric department! Who referred you?”
I suppose I looked a bit like a psychiatric patient in my scruffy jeans, Garfield t-shirt, and dirty sandshoes and the ‘I need some sleep’ look under my dark eyes.

There was the time I went to IKEA and ended up in a holding pattern trying to find the exit (and I asked for directions twice – arghhh). I will never enter another IKEA store, ever!

There was the time that I had bought myself a secondhand car (red holden HT with rust for $400, if I can remember correctly) and drove to work at West End in Brisbane. I was a lab assistant at a blood laboratory (I loved that white lab coat) in my gap year, before I went to Uni. I thought I would go for a drive in my ‘new’ car at lunch-time and got so lost I ended up on my way to Ipswich (another city).

Yes, there could be something wrong in the spatial/relations part of my brain 😉


Note: thanks bluebee for the title (it all started with her wonderful poem on string theory :))

21 thoughts on “Captain Chaos (The Gabe Files)

  1. “who referred you?” LOL! A most enjoyable post all round, Gabrielle 😀 and I think “Lostness” is a great word.
    I have the exact same sentiments about IKEA (and I rarely get lost) – been in there once – never again

  2. You’re by no means alone, Gabrielle. I drove home from work one winter evening and became disorientated by a new lighting arrangement at a roundabout. One I was familiar with in daylight. I went round twice before I got my bearings!

  3. What doctor would refer you to a non existent psych dept? (note use of question mark). I
    Now, let me assure you there is nothing unique about becoming totally lost in Brisbane!

    You are OK Gabe.In fact, that you got out of Brizzie speaks volumes about your sanity!

    • Maybe the wording was slightly different Stafford (re referral) but I knew they thought I was a psych patient (they looked very concerned for my welfare). Brisbane is even worse now for getting lost in, with all those tunnels and new roads – horrific.

  4. Pingback: Superimposition РFugue in Lossless. | Maekitso's Caf̩

  5. I normally have an excellent internal GPS directional system, but there have been episodes related to taking certain medications when it completely crashed and I was constantly getting lost while driving, having no idea where I was on simple errands. It felt very scary. I was always glad when it came back. However, I have a terrible spatial sense. I have no idea how to estimate the size of three dimensional spaces, like houses. You would think the two would be related.

  6. ayeee, took a wrong turn somewhere on the way to a bob dylan concert at the University of Massachusetts. lost for an hour, but upon finally arriving was able to walk right in w/o crowds or waiting just as he launched into ‘like a rolling stone’ and got to walk right up to the front because seating by that time was arbitrary and the friends i was supposed to meet were all in their seats further away – sometimes getting lost is good!

  7. What interesting encounters your misdirection has brought you! I cannot say that I’ve ever had anything quite so interesting happen in terms of being turned around. I have missed the occasional exit and found myself about a fifty miles off track, but nothing wonderful happened as a consequence — except that I once drove Route 7 through Connecticut that way. Must admit it was very pretty.

    You must have an inner compass for adventure!

    • Haha – it didn’t seem like adventure at the time. My kids are used to me getting lost – one day I was lost going to a friend’s place (which I had been to before) and I was getting very stressed – Tessa was patting me on the back (from her car seat behind me) and saying ‘just relax Mum, it will be alright, just breathe deeply’ (she was about 4 at the time – haha).

  8. Thanks Gabrielle for this post. It made for a fantastic prompt. For a while there I thought I wasn’t lost anymore… but today is a brand new day eh?

  9. ‘Lostness’ – I like it. You sound less like you’re lost and more like you’re on a series of adventures. I can just imagine you with all those physicists 😆

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