Political Speak

Political Speak

I want to spend more time with my family
the grey-headed politician
moans on his backbench
as ambitions take a dive
faster than a stash down the toilet
when the cops arrive
unannounced.

It was just a loan between friends
the minister cries out
from minimum security
I have a lot of friends
who want to ensure my
financial security without the need
for favours returned.

I did not sleep with my secretary
we just slept in the same room
it’s tiring working endless days
slaving away for my electorate
far from my family who
I’d like to spend more time with.
I was on the job.

Environmental issues are critical
but complex, not easily understood
by those who are not important ministers
with access to the necessary details
to grasp the complexities of the arguments.
My head is around these issues
no-one is holding a Gunn to it.

No comment.
I do not recall.
These issues are out of my hands.
These matters are for another department.
Yes minister.

17 thoughts on “Political Speak

    • Thanks Paul. I am a bit over pollies suddenly feigning interest in their families after decades of neglect. I bet if they were offered an automatic seat at the head of the country they’d suddenly lose interest in close familial ties.

    • And I love the phrase ‘Pollie smackdown’ – we should do a duo Selma, you have a lovely turn of phrase which I could use. That would make a great title. I was going to tie this in with my Art of Conversation series, but quite frankly Pollies have lost the art of conversation. It’s all a bit one sided.

    • ‘I did not have sexual relations with that woman’.

      ‘I did not inhale’

      Thanks Aletha – it still needs a bit of work this one (did in a hurry), especially that third stanza.

  1. Remember when Bob Hawke said ‘By the year 2000 no child shall live in poverty’? Umm, what happened, Bob? And what about Keating’s good old ‘recession we had to have’?

    Back in 2007, a joint statement signed by Kevin Rudd and Peter Garrett when referring to Japanese whaling declared: “a federal Labor Government will initiate legal action in the international courts to stop the slaughter.” That’s a direct quote. Nothing has happened.

    Smack ’em, down, Gabrielle.

    • Too true. I was going to include a whale reference in the poem, but ended up with the Gunn (pulp mill thing). As an aside one of the funniest books I have is shaped like a banana and is called ‘Paul Keating’s Book of Insults’ – it’s hilarious.

      On John Hewson ‘(His performance) is like being flogged with a warm lettuce’.

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